Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Hello Sanity

Hello sweet sanity. It's so good to be nestled in your comforting embrace once again. I have enjoyed my strange trip down sex, drugs and rock and roll lane, but I am very happy to see you again. How have you been?

So Meredith was freckle-dickin' awesome experience with a capital AWE. I think this is the longest that I've been away from my email/blog in quite some time. I am shocked at the fact that I have had no ill effects from my late night rocking and "rollin'" and frantic speedy dancing. It was nice to get a break from being on vacation. Enjoying yourself can be so demanding.

Some other highlights that I was too tired to mention.

- Some guy told me that I was a demi-god because I had some battery powered white lights on a string wrapped around my head. I told him that I was just a figment of his imagination but I was still happy that he was happy.

- This very sexed up hot girl started talking to be out of the blue and then suggested that I go back to her tent and "get fucked up with her and her friends." On the return to the tent it became quite clear that she was a raging lesbian. Plus she passed out on her chair seconds after we got back to camp.

- The Aussie band called You Am I put on a blisteringly good high energy show that reminded me of the Rolling Stones in their prime.

- My lovely hostess got a bit too fucked up on a combination of several drugs, and much to her surprise, began to see little wooden people climbing about on our picnic table.

- While wandering about looking for our camping area I met a bearded man. He seemed friendly so I brought him back to our campsite. He was very soft spoken when I met him and we discussed capitalism and international politics on the walk back to our camp area, but once there he put on my "magic lights" like some sort of techno crown of thorns and began to get drunk on power when we recognized that he was clearly Jesus. My kranki-sense began to tingle and I left before anything unpleasant happened but I found out later that he got a bit aggravated, began yelling and swearing at the "mortals." He was teased with mocking song parody and in a distraught state he ended up hugging my friend Nance while she had wandered off to have a quiet woodland pee. I imagine that it would be a bit disconcerting to get a surprise embrace from Jesus while answering the call of nature.

Why no pictures you may be asking. Well, I was in a great mood as I returned from my friend Jelly's place and I left my little green backpack with my camera and my ipod on the mother-fucking train. I gave it up for long gone after trying to track it down through the train stations. Then at dinner this evening I got a call from some guy whose mother in law had found my bag and turned it in. I was delighted and I'll be picking it up tomorrow at 10 am.

It makes me feel good that shortly before I left LA I found a wallet full of money and credit cards and went out of my way to return it to its owner. Karma seems to actually work here in Australia. Have I escaped the Karma-free zone?

At any rate, I'll slap some pictures up on the blog once I get my camera back and share more tales of Rex, Sugs and Drock and Roll.

It's been a good week to be krankiboy. Thank you to all the amazing people I got to spend time with at Meredith. It was a quintessential Australian experience that I won't soon forget despite taking two showers to wash the Grit and Grime off my body. God bless Mrs. Abbas who found my bag, with my camera, ipod, Slinky shirt and a few other important items. I'm going to get a ride to her place tomorrow to retrieve my things. I think I'd also like to get her a nice gift to thank her for tracking me down to return my bag. She sounds quite old so maybe a simple wet and frisky pash will suffice.


BEVIS said...


BEVIS said...

Give Mrs Abbas some little wooden people - if there are any left. Or maybe introduce her to Jesus.

fluffy said...

Good to see you back in such fine fettle Krankidoll. Just between you and me (and BEVIS and Quirkie, obviously) I think this place might be growing on you. I have a You Am I 'best of' double CD you can put on your iPod for further study of our culture.

Jellyfish said...

Those battery-powered fairy lights were mine, ninja. Credit where credit is due, sil vous plait.

God bless Mrs Abbas! Hey, maybe she has my house keys?

Also, didn't you once find a camera belonging to some Japanse tourists, develop the photos (those Japanese go HUGE at Universal studios!) and then not give the camera back? If so, you are very lucky that the karma gods have decided to overlook that little trangression and instead take note of the more recent return of the wallet. Yes, I remember everything I read. You have been warned.

(ps -whose house were you returning from? :P)

Jess said...

Nance? Nance?

I am so very confused.

But adore ye, brother x

MelbourneGirl said...

mrs abbas would prefer a little lavender bag or some fine imported tea.

Quirkie said...

Glad you're back and feeling happy, petal.

You've Got What I Need... said...

Perhaps you could give her a quick rub down, kranki. Matty has a friend with some extra virgin olive oil that you could borrow. Nothing says "thank you for returning my bag to me" like a good surprise greasing.

Peter said...

...surprise greasing...
and a happy finish!