Tuesday, May 16, 2006

The Last Picture Show

So we're sitting there about to start a DVD up when the television shuts itself off and begins to make a strange, irritating bird-like beeping. Then a bit of pungent, gross, plasticy smoke puffed out of the side. Fearing that there might be some sort of explosion I quickly unplugged it.

Dude, my TV blew up. I was annoyed but that feeling quickly turned into a genuine sadness.

It took a few moments of just sitting there soaking in the moment. I am not a huge TV addict but I think I had some shock I needed to work through. It didn't just feel like some appliance had broken. There was a certain sadness beyond the inconvenience and expense. Teevee was gone. He was dead and he had cried out in pain. He was only about 7 years old. He should have had a long healthy life ahead of him but that's not going to happen now. All I have left are the quality moments that Teevee and I shared. So many good football and basketball playoff games and goofy infomercials. I will always remember the time that my dogs hopped of the couch and growled at you while you were showing me that nature program about hyenas. I am sorry that I threw that grape at you when the Election Results showed that Bush, and not Al Gore had won Florida back in 2000. That wasn't your fault and I should not have taken my frustration out on you. I am both comforted and disconcerted by the fact that the last thing TV played for me was the film Happy Endings. It was a good movie. You were a good television. I'll miss you.

Teevee is survived by his long time-companion the Sony combination VHS and DVD player.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Confucius say... You're Fucked!

I went out to a Thai Restaurant last night and had a lovely meal. At the end of the meal we received fortune cookies. They were sealed in little plastic pouches. I opened mine to read it and it was empty. No fortune. What does this mean?

Also, if you have dreams that the tires on your car blow out and that the wheels on your shopping cart pop what does that mean?