Relax and Let Yourself Go

At 6:56 PM, Lushlife said...
Okay I am going to ask the sex question. Okay it's two questions but that's because you may have a negative response to the first query and thought I would go with a followup. I don't recall you limiting to one query per person anyway. Have you ever experienced sexual dysfunction? If yes, what did you say to your partner at the time? If no, then what is your most embarrassing sexual experience/experience with the opposite sex ?

Well, Lushlife, you asked for it so Here it is. I don't know why I'm sharing this. But I am.

I remember it was a particularly hot July in Boston that year. I'd decided to spend the Summer there rather than go home to be bored with my family. I was 19 and had just finished my freshman year of college. My good friend Hanna was also in the city for the Summer and we spent a good deal of time together just hanging out. Hanna's cute friend Gwen would stop by once in a while. Gwen was a girl I knew from the honors program whom I had met on my very first day of class Freshman year. I was fascinated with her right away. Gwen was a very attractive, young woman with long blonde hair, beautiful skin, and a coy smile. She also radiated sexuality like I'd never seen before. I was shy back then and I let 13 months go by and said nothing to Gwen other than the occasional, "Hey did you finish that paper?" and "Wasn't that chapter boring?" Just hi and bye stuff and usually within a large group of people.

One day that Summer, I was over at Hanna's place when Hanna told me that Gwen had made a passing comment about me. She'd asked Hanna if I had a girlfriend. A what? Oh, like back in High School... a girlfriend, right. Hanna mentioned this to me and I was simultaneously confused, scared and intrigued. I had never even considered that this girl was in my league. Plus the fact of the matter was that I was still a virgin at 19. Gwen was an experienced, young woman, confident in her sexuality. She worked at the Condommania store on Boylston Street and probably spent her days flirting and giving helpful hints about sex and sex toys and what not to customers. I really had no idea, because I was too scared to even go in there by myself. I was at the other end of the sexuality spectrum, but it was a hot Summer and the time for action was long overdue. With Hanna's encouragement I phoned Gwen and asked if she'd like to come down to where I lived and I'd make her dinner at my place. I didn't realize that was a terrible situation for a first date. I just thought I'd impress her. My pasta and chicken were bland, I was nervous, and things were not going well. I had no clue what I was supposed to do to work my way towards physical intimacy. My nervousness confused her and made her feel uncomfortable. The conversation was stilted and then, mercifully, my roommate Mira came home and Gwen and I had a reason to excuse ourselves to my room. We awkwardly sat on the bed and I wasn't getting any signs from her. Maybe this was just a friendly thing? She didn't seem that into me and there was no chemistry. But eventually we did end up kissing a bit in my brightly lit, utterly sterile, and entirely unromantic room. After some awkward kissing and cuddling - all first base stuff. Gwen said that she had to go as she was doing inventory early the next morning at the Condom Store. I was intimidated. I'd never actually seen a condom before other than those that would occasionally wash up on the beach or show up in the dorm garbage can. We spoke on the phone a few days later and much of the nervousness between us had disappeared now that we'd put our tongues in each others mouths. Thank God I was a good kisser. I've always received hig marks on that at least. I suppose if you got to 19 without doing any more than using your finger once you had better compensate with some serious smooching skills.

The second time Gwen and I decided that I should go to her place since it was right in Boston and we could hang out after she and I finished work. I walked over to her place and I was covered in sweat. Half from nervousness and half from the heat. When she opened the door I saw that she was wearing a cool tank top and very snug, beat-up jeans. I worked up the nerve and gave her a small kiss hello. We just hung out and talked and watched TV and were both thankful that the ice had been broken. We were having a really good time hitting it off and drinking lots of fruit punch to stay cool on a very humid night. Before we knew it, it was pretty late in the evening. I was going to have to run to make the last train to my apartment on the other side of town. I was having a good time and things were going soo well and her roommate was gone for the weekend. So, not wanting to leave her lovely company and go back to my dreary room, I bravely and casually asked if she would mind if I crashed at her place on the couch or her roommate's bed. She stepped up to the moment. She closed the door that I was about to leave from and just nodded. "Yeah," she said, "But my couch isn't comfortable and my roommate doesn't like anybody else sleeping in her bed. I have a big fan we can share so you should sleep in my bed." Wow. That was almost enough to make my jaw drop. I was immediately terribly nervous. I had wanted to stay and maybe kiss and cuddle a bit, but now she was insisting that I share her bed with her. I was as frightened as I was aroused. We had some more punch and then kissed a bit. I felt like a suave and savvy guy. It was terribly hot and swelteringly humid that night but I was just happy to be there. Gwen had this big giant closet where her bed was. She excused herself to change for bed. I had nothing with me and I wasn't going to sleep in cargo pants. I waited. A few minutes later she came back wearing just a thin, oversized green T-shirt, and little blue panties. She pressed her body up against me and I could feel that she didn't have a bra on. I felt the blood rush out of my brain and I thought I was going to feint. My heart was pounding and the sugar from the fruit punch had me wired. She gave me an extra toothbrush and I went into the bathroom and brushed my teeth. I thought about using the toilet to take pee, but it occurred to me that once I got my penis out to pee, it was not going to be able to go back into my briefs. I took off my cargo pants and looked into the mirror in horror. I was wearing my little bright red briefs. I hadn't thought I'd be spending the night. I looked like I was wearing The Flash Underoos. And my cute red Underoos were struggling to contain my "excitement." I splashed some water on my face and walked out with my pale skinny legs that looked even whiter next to my red undies. I tried to act casual as she was already in bed. She smiled and gestured for me to get on the bed. I made some lame joke about having superhero underwear. I climbed onto the queen-size bed and we made a bit of small talk before I was able to calm down and begin to get sleepy. She seemed like she was out before me and I was a bit relieved that we were going to take things in slow stages. Sleep wanted to take me but I kept looking down at her crotch as if hypnotized by it. I could also see part of her breast peeking through the worn collar of her T-shirt. Now I was feeling really warm as it was already humid and hot night to begin with. It had only been a few minutes and I took off my shirt so I could get to sleep in the heat. I closed my eyes but I was too turned on to sleep. She was sleeping and in her sleep she gently slid her thigh up against mine. Her soft, smooth flesh felt amazing. I stayed perfectly still until it dawned upon me that she was moving her thigh ever so slowly up and down my leg. She was awake. I softly put my hand on her leg and the next thing I knew we were making out like mad. It was a blur of soft wet lips, ears, neck, nape, shoulders, chin. She moved my hands onto her breasts and I rolled up closer to her and pulled her cotton shirt over her head. Her long hair brushed up against my neck and I was on fire. We were groping and fondling one another in a frenzy. I licked her firm belly and she made a little moan of delight and encouragement. I was just going on instinct as I was in sexually uncharted waters. I then ran my fingers along the elastic of her panties. I slowly peeled and teased her panties down her waist and off her legs. A surge of lust hit me like a wave and I immediately began going down on her. I had no idea what I was doing but whatever I was doing seemed to be very much appreciated because after just a minute of lapping her sweet and salty thighs and sucking her holy treasure she rolled me onto my back and pinned my arms. Gwen began to move her tongue down my chest, belly, thighs... nibbling at all the right spots along the way. When she put me into her mouth I was in heaven. I had seen it done in movies and in magazines, but they must have taught her some additional skills at Condommania because it was intense. I was clutching my fingers and grabbing at the mattress. I was a bit self-conscious because I didn't seem to have to do anything but touch her hair and neck. I told myself that I had to just relax and enjoy, just go with the good feeling. Then she looked up at me, still holding my member against her lips, and said, "You are so big and hard in my mouth. I will be having my way with you. How does that sound?" I must have squeaked something to indicate yes or good because I remember she replied in a very sultry tone "Exxccelllent." I felt so good and so much bigger than I ever recalled being. The sweat from her breasts felt divine as she slid and sucked and sucked and slid with her nipples caressing my legs. I was still a bit tense and was concentrating so hard on just letting myself go with it. Finally I did let myself go. For an instant it felt marvelous. An instant later I realized that I wasn't coming in her mouth, I was shotgunning piss down her throat. I must have had seven glasses of fruit punch and hadn't used the bathroom the entire time I'd been there. I knew there was big trouble when I couldn't stop the hard flow of urine into her mouth. I could feel her trying not to gag and swallowing and swallowing. It was the longest 8 seconds of my life. Things had been going so well and I was in such good hands but I couldn't stop myself from peeing. I was finally able to clench and she quickly took her mouth off of me and rolled over. I quickly hopped up, put on my briefs and went to empty what was left in my bladder in the bathroom. I flushed and felt so excruciatingly, unbearably, embarrassed. I washed my hands and went back to the bed where she was sitting. She was completely motionless and stunned. There was a long awkward moment with me standing there in nothing but my bright red briefs and her looking down at the bed. Neither of us knew what to say. "Can I get you some fruit punch... to drink... for your mouth?" I finally asked her, trying to be polite after having accidentally used her as a urinal. "No." She said, "Nothing, no. I'm fine." We lay in bed at opposite sides of the mattress and we didn't speak a single word. I was grossed out for her and embarrassed for the both of us. I even got up and brought her a glass of fruit punch and a glass of water. She had a sip of water. That sip somehow made me feel a tiny bit better and I rolled over into the fetal position holding a pillow.

I awoke the next morning. Gwen was already up and dressed. I quickly slid on my cargo pants, grabbed my wallet and keys off the coffee table and left while making as little eye contact as possible. Horror. I hurried home and showered, listened to some music and wondered who I could go to for advice. Nobody. It was too mortifying. The phone rang and it was my friend Hanna. "What did you do last night, Kranki?" I paused before speaking. "Uh... I was at Gwen's apartment for a while, missed the train and sorta crashed there." I said. "Kranki, I just talked to Gwen but she seemed really... distant. Oooo, wait did you spend the night? This is so exciting, you have to tell me everything. Well, even if you don't I know that Gwen will." Wonderful I thought. I made up a quick excuse and hung up the phone.

Two days later I was at Star Market getting some groceries. I turned down the cereal aisle with my cart and there was Gwen and some guy friend. They were standing right there in front of me. Gwen saw me and she froze. It took her a few seconds to register that it really was me standing there. Then she tried to force a smile as if everything was just super. Her pale face became flushed and her entire head turned a bright beet red color. It was a red color that I thought I'd seen someplace before. I muttered an awkward "see ya around," and hurried off with my cart. I stopped on the other side of the store in the frozen food section. I took a few deep breaths. That's when I realized where it was I'd seen the exact shade of red that had filled Gwen's flushed face. Her blush of embarrassment was the exact color of the sinister red fruit punch. Almost as bright red as my Underoos.