Cholester-wrong

I weigh 143 lbs when soaking wet and yet, after my physical, my doctor tells me that I have slightly high cholesterol and should watch my diet. What? Who the hell is going to eat all those plates of French fries, and bowls of ice cream if not me? It's not fair. It's completely unfair. Why? Well, I don't have an actual fancy reason why it's not fair, but damn it, I'm Krankiboy and I have a reputation for overreaction and irritability to maintain. So that's why it's totally unfair. I guess I'm going to have to go back to the gym because other than avoiding fried foods, which I can do, I'm not going to alter my diet. In fact the millisecond that I heard I had high cholesterol (which is such an old person thing by the way) all I could imagine was the taste of Haagen Das and a nice Deli Sandwich dripping with mayo and pastrami. In just a few days I've consumed two enormous Philly cheese steak sandwiches that were each easily the size of a Daschund, three servings of ice cream, (I take issue with what they consider the appropriate serving size) pasta with butter and cheese and butter, a grilled Corn Beef Reuben sandwich, Beef Brisket and an enormous steak (plus the half a steak that Penny couldn't finish... Plus some other stuff that wasn't as healthy (think southern barbecue then double that - do ribs and potato salad have cholesterol) Oh, but instead of French fries at the burger place I opted for a healthy salad... with lots of blue cheese dressing.

I wonder where this self-destructive attitude comes from. It's near to impossible, unless you make a genuine effort, to eat healthy food. It doesn't taste as good as the other kind. I haven't been to McDonald's since I watched Super Size Me.

Tonight we had a lovely time at Table 8 on Melrose where I wisely drank lots of red wine to help lower my cholesterol. We were out celebrating Penny winning a case against an un-named Automobile Company whose letters can be rearranged to spell out DORF. You'll never figure it out. Really quite amazing food. I may have to take my Boudist friend there when he's in town, or possibly to the Inn of the Seventh Ray. Damn we have good eats here in Los Angeles. No karma, no soul, no substance, but good eats.


FYI: I didn't write this next bit.

www.roadfood.com

This is a great site if you travel and are a big food fag like myself. I will travel hundreds of miles or walk until my feet are bleeding to have a a great meal. If another known foodie friend tells me about an amazing barbeque place in the foothills of Tennessee that's only about an hour and forty minutes off my route and it's in the back of some old black guy's shack in a converted above ground pool, but there are no regular hours and you have to hope he's in a good mood and his daughter's home or they won't be open and there's no phone number. I'm there in a heartbeat. This site is VERY informative, with tons of thoroughly researched listings. The authors are a husband and wife team (and they're fat too!) who have put out a number of books. I've used them on cross-country trips and they've never steered me wrong yet.