Monday, February 27, 2006

It's Raining Outside

The one day I don't feel like fucking (blogging) it's raining outside. So what is a krankiboy to do? Yeah, of course I already did that. Yes, I did that too, I think the neighbors could see me so I stopped. Okay, I'll try again. Looks like it's back to the pet store. I hope they don't put a limit on how many hamsters you can purchase in one day.

I'm going to comment objectively on this Krankiboy Khronicles blog. Here are my problems with it.

#1) It's doesn't have as many original stories on it as it used to.

#2) It's too self-referential/indulgent lately.

#3) What happened to those pictures with the funny captions?

#4) It had 300 daily readers and now it has, like, 70 so I feel like I must be doing something wrong.

#5) No edge.

#6) Bevis got his own spin off show and it's better than the original.

#7) See #2

I'm going to take something bit-sized out of the medicine cabinet and take it at random now. It's an especially fun game to play at a friend's house. It could be a Tylenol, or a laxative. It could be a xanax, it could be an anti-depressant, it could be a bath bead. You just never know if it's going to cure your acidic stomach or send you to the ER. Kids, go now and try this at home.

Send me nasty and hurtful comments.


BEVIS said...

Nasty and hurtful comments? Never.

I have to admit to something:

There I was, happily reading your Khronicles, then I got to the lime green (we'll come back to that later) reference to me getting my own spin off show, and I chuckled to myself.

Then I realised: Huh?

I don't actually know what you mean by that. Just that I started up my own blog? Dude, that was nine months ago! And I don't know about it being "better than the original". Compare our totally unreliable counters if you need proof that you're a popular and much admir'd guy. What brought on this bout of self-loathing?

I apologise for my infrequent visits of late; it has not been due to any diminishing affection of you or your work. You rock. My life has just been in somewhat of a turmoil lately, but I hope to return to my stalkerish visitations shortly. You'll soon realise how good you had it when I was coming and going. :)

In fact, I want so much to stress that I still love you, that I'm going to apologise in American for you:

"I apologize, Kranki ... ya jerk!"

The original intent there was to spell 'apologise' incorrectly, but the added American insult seemed to top off the apology nicely, and still retain the appropriate international flavour.

I have very much appreciated receiving the occasional comment from you recently, by the way. It has sent a little shiver of happiness from my neck, down my spine, right to my ... um ... toes.

Anyway, about the lime green ... same to you, ya jerk!

Dangerous Dave said...

I thought the song said "It never rains in southern california", damn pesky global warming. Turn that frown upside down young man.

kranki said...

I think the rain has my mood in it's moist talons of watery wetness.

No apology needed Bevis. We're all invited to the same party here in beautiful Blogville. I was just expressing my mood with the words and such. Life seems a tad pointless lately. Not sure what I need to be doing or what is going to make me happy in the long run. DOn't get divorced, it really scrambles your eggs. And if you do get divorced, get the hell out of LA on the swiftest horse that can carry you.

BEVIS said...

I'm confused. What if I get divorced and I'm not in LA to start with? How do I get outta there?

That kind of thinking can fry a man's brain circuitry!

Chai said...

Dont read this the wrong way but apparently there are more suicides on sunny days than there are on rainy days. Something to do with the contrast of how one feels and the environment.
That's all. Carry on.
Good grief, how many letters do they want in the word verification thing? I have to keep hitting preview until I get one I'm happy to type in. It's like playing the pokies, and equally thrilling. 9 letters!? Ahhhh, finally, "nariz", come to daddy.

elaine said...

Chin up, tiger.

er. um. I mean. You're ugly and I hate you.


ps What did happen to those small pictures with the funny captions?

pps I hope you didn't end up with the ritalin, that could be disastrous on a rainy day.

Tammiodo said...

Kranki... i visit you every day. And i don't even know you.

But let me just express my sincere graditude to you for helping to alleviate my boredom at work. I will be forever in debt to you.

Oh... and i'd remove the bath salts from the cupboard before playing that game. Previous bad experience.