Sunday, February 19, 2006

Jellyfacts

Fourteen Fantastic Facts about Jellyfish the Blogger!

  1. The Eskimos have over fifty words for Jellyfish the Blogger.
  2. Half a cup of Jellyfish the Blogger contains only seventeen calories!
  3. It took Jellyfish the Blogger 22 years to build the Taj Mahal.
  4. If you place Jellyfish the Blogger at your window she will keep vampires at bay!
  5. Jellyfish the Blogger can be found wherever adorable brown children congregate.
  6. Jellyfish the Blogger weighs as much as 2 adult female wombats wearing motorcycle helmets.
  7. Jellyfish the Blogger is one of my dearest friends, so, if you even think ill of her you shall be eternally cursed to have hair grow inside your mouth.
  8. Scientific studies show that Jellyfish the Blogger is highly susceptible to seduction when intoxicated.
  9. Jellyfish the Blogger lives with two beautiful and devoted wives.
  10. Once Jellyfish the Blogger said that she was sorry when told she was being too apologetic.
  11. Jellyfish the Blogger has been mistaken for a 14 year old girl with big boobies.
  12. The Earth's Yellow sun is thought to be the source of Jellyfish the Blogger's super powers.
  13. Jellyfish the Blogger can channel the spirits of fearsome pirate captains while asleep.
  14. February 20th is Jellyfish the Blogger's Birthday.

Jellyfish the Blogger is not available in stores, but through this limited internet promotion she can be yours for 16 easy payment of just 189.95!!*

Act Now! Supply is limited!

*50% of all proceeds go to educating headless children who are on fire.

5 comments:

Bruce said...

I'll take one. Where do I send my CC details?

kranki said...

Send your details to krankiboy@yahoo.com

You're smart to get it while supplies are still in stock.

snazzy said...

As one of Jellyfish The Blogger's devoted wives, I would like to express my appreciation for your insightful research on this most auspicious of days. Fact number eight will certainly come in handy this evening.

canoe said...

As Jellyfish The Blogger's other devoted wife I highly recommend obtaining one. She provides hours of joy and much happinness. As for point eight, the shelves are already stocked!

Jellyfish said...

Kranki!

*hugs*

Wife Canoe told me to visit your blog, but I didn't know why! Thankyou so much. This is the best birthday present so far.*

Knowing you has brought extra sunshine, bigger smiles and the best possible Jodie Foster impersonations into my life. Thankyou for being my adopted big bro.

I have not had a drink since your party so Item 8 will be times 1 million next time the devil's liquid passes my lips. Mwahahhah.



*Only other present receieved so far is pink fuzzy jumper from Ancient Nana ('Bringing you and your family Catholic-flavoured bitterness and misery since 1906') so presently not huge amount of competition. BUT I STILL THINK YOURS WILL BE THE BEST ANYWAY.