RoboMaid - Fuck the Future

The future is here people and it wants to clean you floor and scare your pets.

See the future HERE



What the fuck am I going to do with my French Maid outfit with the peek-a-boo nipple zippers? I probably can't bring it back now that I've worn it a few times. The fish nets are a bit shredded from when I... they're a bit worn, let's leave it at that.

RoboMaid? How hard is it to sweep a floor? What kind of pathetic lazy piece of crap is going to pay to have their floors cleaned by this thing. My maid does a much better job and she even does dishes. If you think being Krankiboy's housekeeper is a sweet gig, then you probably just escaped a war-torn impoverished country in South America. Do they want my house keeper to starve so they can sell some god damn remote controlled flying saucer? This is America and we sure as hell don't want to hear any innovative ideas, it just makes more work for everybody.

Robo Maid? Didn't anybody see the movie Runaway with Tom Selleck and Kirstie Alley? And the enormous talents of Cynthia Rhodes. Who? Yes, the Cynthia Rhodes. I bet you didn't know that she was famous. Well her website says otherwise.

Anyway, for the 0.04% of you who did see that 1984 Sci-fi epic. Weren't those little robot spiders scary as all fuck. And how about the nanny bot who took the baby hostage. It makes you paranoid if you think about how much computers know about you. It's just like when you get a big dog you always want to ask yourself "If this computer turns on me can I take him?" I fear that my blog will one day become sentient and no longer need me any more. It will just put up whatever self-indulgent crap that it wants to pretend is somehow quirky or clever. But I know that you, my loyal readers... I know that the three of you will be able to spot a change in the writing if my computer began to blog instead of me. Right? Okay probably not.

So here are some things to look for to if you suspect that my blog has begun to write itself without me.

(1 Excellent spelling. That would be a giveaway.

2) An absence of run-on sentences that are too long and try to include more than one idea like some literary scooby sandwich all pressed together where it has no business being.

3) Consistancy of a continued thought so that when you read... you know I have this little stuffed dragon by my keyboard. I bought at the store and it's so freaking cute, anyway I'll have to write a post about it.

4) Brevity. If you should see that my posts are concise and funny and don't yammer on like a narcissistic radio DJ on crack that is a good sign that my blog may have just taken over.

5) Some kind of original type of humor and or poignant thoughts. Like, oh I can't think of anything.


https://www.asseenontvnetwork.com/vcc/telebrands/robomaid/131439/

Gonna go do a google search for robot porn now. Wish me luck.

Krankiboy

And yes, this post was written in the future.

Yours in Safety

Okay, I got this email below. I didn't make it up. I'm not that talented a writer.

krankiboy, following is a story how the Pepper Pager was used. At the end of the story, you will find a bonus offer just for you.

Kim loved spending time with the kids at the community center. She remembered how important her mentors were to her when she was growing up, and she enjoyed the chance to give something back. The only thing she didn't enjoy about her volunteer work was trying to find a safe parking place in the neighborhood. Some nights, she really understood why so many of these kids were at risk. At the same time, she wanted to project an air of confidence and security - she couldn't let any of her kids see how nervous she was. That's when she discovered the Pepper Pager. The Pepper Pager looks like a standard pager - the kind that many business people clip to their belts. Instead of delivering important messages, the Pepper Pager protects its owners from dangerous attackers by concealing up to twelve bursts of debilitating pepper spray.

One night, while heading back to her car after a late session, a haggard man accosted Kim on the street, demanding money. She tried to walk past him, but he kept blocking her path.

"What's your hurry?" he asked. Another man strolled out from an alleyway behind Kim.
"Hey, Jake," he called out, "this girl's in a hurry!"

Kim pleaded, "Just let me pass, guys."

Jake mocked her, crying, "Just let me pass," in a sing-song voice. Jake's friend reached out to grab her.
That's when she grabbed the Pepper Pager from her belt and sprayed the attacker right in the eyes. As he screamed in pain, Kim spun around to see Jake lunging at her. She blasted a second shot of pepper spray at him, which sent him tumbling through the ground. Kim ran up the street, hopped in her car, locked the doors and dialed 9-1-1. Within minutes, two less criminals haunted that neighborhood.

Yours in safety, Ron http://www.a1safetyproducts.com/

First of all... Wow. A pepper spray powerful enough to send a person "tumbling through the ground." I want one.

Okay, I fully accept that the entire story is both rivetingly suspenseful and completely true and I plan to purchase several hundred Pepper Pagers immediately or perhaps even sooner. I do have a few questions about the story.

Was teasing and sing-song voiced mockery included on the list of criminal charges in the case against Jake and Jake's friend?

How do you prove attempted assault/rape?

It never said if Kim was wearing something skimpy or slutty, so I don't know whether or not "she was asking for it."

I don't get why Kim would choose to work in a neighborhood that is both dangerous and "haunted." Those poor kids.

Lastly, who the fuck still uses a pager? This is state of the art technology for 1987.

Does anybody know what the moral of the story is? To me it seemed to suggest that it is unwise to be friends with anybody named Jake because they could be a bad influence and or rapist buddy.


P.S. krankiboy, you can get your own Pepper Pager today so you can be prepared to defend yourself against attackers up to ten feet away. Visit: www.a1safetyproducts.com/pepperpager.html. We have the Pepper Pager on sale for only $11.17! P.P.S. If you order within the next five days, I will give you aFREE 32-page Pepper Spray Tactical Use booklet...a $5.00 value. Just mention FREE Pepper Spray Booklet in the comments box when you check out. Don't forget... if you don't mention FREE Pepper Spray Booklet, we won't know to send it to you.

Thanks, Ron and thanks also for being mine in safety.

I will sleep well tonight knowing that there is a Tactical Use booklet for this criminal stomping spray.

WARNING... TANGENT:
Back in college we had a campus safety meeting where a police lieutenant came to our dorm lounge to talk to the students about what to do if you are attacked. What I remember clearly is that he was old, he reminded me of Archie Bunker, he spend a lot of time looking at the girls chestal regions. His two pieces of advice about what to do if somebody tries to rape you were:

1) The girls should try and get themselves to throw up on the guy because that would "kill his mood."

2) They should not attempt to fight back at all because they could be hurt. They should yell for him to stop and if the rapist does not stop then "they should just lay back and try to enjoy it."

He was truly one of Boston's finest.

Then he gave his card out in case we needed to contact him with any "questions." But he said that he only had enough cards to give out to the girls. Most of the young women looked as if they were going to either cry, or stab him in the throat.

Is it for dogs? Could be. 

Things in My Box - Part 2

This was in my inbox. Then the comments after I dont' get.

So many potential flings you might get overwhelmed by booty ;) http://tchristianera.com/somekindoffate/werelate/strong.htm as if thats possible. For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord. After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one. I think it would be a good idea.

Oh a phoneless cord... now I get it. That actually quite clev- stupid. Nothing turns me on more than a bad pun. Welcome to Sticky-ville population... me.

I think that anybody who has had a loved one tragically smothered to death in an ass eating incident gone wrong would be really insulted by the notion that you can't be overwhelmed by booty.

I love you nana and I miss you terribly.

See you all at the support group. Bring bagels.

Rumors or Trumors?

At 3:08 PM, Freelancer said...

Oh I larfed and I larfed! But seriously, Kranki-Wan-Kantanky, you must have connections in the No Karma Zone... What would you say to the rumour that Yoda's been peddling about town since Oprah was a boy..."A Big Gay Al, supposedly this Cruise is..."


Well, a reliable source told my friend's cousin's aunt-in law that Yoda once trained Cruise to be a Jedi, but ever since Cruise turned to the Dark Side (during the filming of Days of Thunder) Yoda and Yoda's publicist have been trying to brand Cruise with the closet queer label. Personally I don't care where Cruise sticks his light saber.

What I can say about rumors is that they have a remarkable way of being true. Rumors are what separate us from the primates. Without rumors all we have are facts and facts are boring. Here, I'll prove it.

Did you know that the United States has 5.8% unemployment which is some of the highest since 1976. See boring and depressing. We need rumors.

Here in the No Karma Zone we don't even call them rumors. We call them interesting information.

So here is some Interesting Information.

Jodie Foster - wisely prefers girls over guys. (Could be true)

I can tell you that I have a firsthand account of John Travolta making out with a man in a parked car. (True)

And another source close to this reporter will verify that Mr Kevin Spacey does not discriminate on the basis of age or gender when gets hungry for a no-pants dance. (Could be true)

And Topher Grace... is totally into girls. (Could be true)

And Robert Downey Jr. He likes to fu- Hmmm... I better not say, I'm told he occasionally reads this blog. (True)

Sadly or gladly, I don't hear that much celebrity gossip nowadays. Ten-year-olds don't have as much juicy celeb gossip to share as people who work in the eviltainment industry. Although it was a ten-year-old that told me about Spacey.

There is even a rumor going around that I (Krankiboy) have a "fish fetish." That is so exaggerated that it's almost untrue.

You get videotaped felating one dolphin at Sea World while being rimmed by a walrus and people immediately want to judge you.

"Fish Fettish?!" They're mammals people!

Mammals!

Scientology Strikes Back

EPILOGUE:

A FEW DAYS AGO

IN A CITY NOT FAR AWAY...

Dissolve To:

Ext. Chicago Skyline

Cut To:

Int. The Oprah Winfrey Show Studios

Oprah is midway through an interview with Tom Cruise.

TOM: "Oprah, the force is strong in you. But even you can not resist the power of Scientology. The Scientology sside iss ssstronger."

OPRAH: "Tom, for a white boy you got a cute lil ass and all, but the only dark side I like is on a chicken. Plus, I'm down with G-O-D."

TOM: "Then you leave me no choice. Feel the full wrath of the Dark Side.
Muhwahahahahahahaaahhh!"

Watch the Battle > Click Here <

or on this link below

http://mirror.randomfoo.net/memes/2005/06/Tom_Cruise_Kills_Oprah.mov

Modern Indian Names

Hey. Sometimes a good bitch session can go a long way towards making you feel better. Especially when you cryptically fault find your friends on a semi-public forum and a bunch of them contact you to apologize for not writing you back sooner. Others will pretend that they never read the post and have "mysteriously" begun to revert back to they way they used to act towards you. So the expression about the squeaky wheel getting the oil has rung true. Although in this case ?whining and pouting like a sour-faced wuss baby? is more accurate than ?squeaky.?

I suppose that it?s all forgiven because I tell you up front that these are the chronicles of a cranky boy. Man, those two words look weird spelled with the letter ?c? and not a ?k.? Crap. Is the period supposed to go inside the quotes or outside? Somebody clear that up for me please. I don?t really know how to punctuate. It comes from so many years typing sitcom dialogue where you write it how you want it said. That?s why I am constantly using the?. you know? ellipse or as we shitcom writers like to call it the ?dot dot dot?.

Where was I? Oh yes, I was going to say that more people should be honest and upfront about themselves, embrace who they are and stop pretending to be something that they?re not. In fact we should all have more appropriate names that tell something more about us. Like Indian names do. They give you a sense of what the person is like.

If you are going to select somebody for the tribal council you are more likely to choose "Stone Tree" than "Runs from Thunder." Now go with me on this for a second. Wouldn?t it be better to have a name that means something. Instead of boring Doug Johnson you would have "Good with a Hammer." That tells me a fuck-load more than some bland-ass name that six-thousand other people have. Instead of Jennifer Andrews you?d have "Fiery Temper." Then Jennifer can feel free to be the royal bitch that the great spirit made her to be. With Modern Indian names you'd know what you should expect if you were to marry a man named "Humps Anything That Moves." Only "Couldn?t Care Less Cause She Just Married for the Money" or "Oblivious Whore" should consider dating him.

Happy marriages would also be easier to arrange. "Reads Many Books" wouldn?t end up married to Loves Professional Wrestling or Sits in the Dark and Drinks Whiskey, she?d be better off in a relationship with Always Playing Scrabble or Mad About Motzart.

Adjusts his Crotch in Public would know that Never Wears a Bra is the right girl for him. Avid Sex Toy User and Enjoys a Good Spanking would live happily ever after.

In fact, you would know that Complete Fucking Narcissist and It?s All About Me are probably going to forget your birthday again this year unless Loves Her Palm Pilot calls to remind them.

Drinks Like a Fish and Talks About Tits could be fun guys to hang out with, but you wouldn?t invite them to any important Thanksgiving meals with the family.

So you know my Modern Indian Name would be Cranky Like a Boy.

Give it up. What?s your Modern Indian Name? And if you have to tell us why it?s a good name for you? then it?s probably not a very good name.

Here are some more inspirational Modern Indian Names.

Prefers Plants to People
Takes it in the Ass
Lies About her Age
Big Fan of Hitler
Addicted to Semen

Things in My Box

This was in my inbox. The Spelling is what disturbs me. Monkeys on sedatives couldn't spell filled that badly.

Usurpation B. Taxied

Fw: Young Bitch Fileld with Cum
Sun 06/19
4k

I think it might just be an "R" rated link. I didn't open it because:

A) The poor spelling did not bode well for the quality of the youthful cum-filled bitch.

B) I was afraid to look because it might have been like some female German Shepherd and that would be upsetting.

C) It makes no sense as we are all walking around filled with... you know.

D) I did not want to risk setting off a Spam-alanche that might bury my poor inbox with a plethora of offers to play Online High-Stakes Poker, purchase cheap Viagra, or enlarge my penis so much that it can be seen from outer space.

4:33 AM Thoughts

I have a pretty good post on the horizon. This is merely a pre-post to the actual post. I just wanted to let you know that as Jelly so nicely put it "cryptically bitching" about people on my blog actually has positive results.

They are:

1) Several friends immediately get back in touch with me. Cool.

2) Fluffy wants to hold me to her blog bosom and nurture me back to happytown. I haven't seen the bosom yet, but she's pretty damn nurturing.

3) My penis grew 2 inches and I got rock hard abs

4) Bevis refers to him self as friend ZZZ

5) The Lesbian girls next door decide to have hot sex with the curtains open.

6) I feel a bit better.

7) The theme from Sanford and Son ring tone arrives on my phone.

8) Cats and Dogs make sweet love with each other.

Actually my dogs cornered a possum in the backyard earlier tonight. It was a big fucker. They are simultaneously cute and scary. Kind of like a baby holding a handgun. Which, by the way, I don't recommend.

I want to go to a shooting range. Get out some aggression. Or just go Gallagher on a stack of melons. I will put links to Jelly, Fluffy, Possums and Gallagher later. For now, if you really want to, you can find them.

So yeah, as I was saying before I so rudely interrupted myself with extraneous thoughts, I have what I hope will be an amusing interactive blog on the horizon. Now I am going to pass out someplace near my bed. You wanna cyber spoon?

Alone and Kranki

Back in college I thought about making a list of my friends and ranking them from best to worst so everyone would know how good a job they are doing and where they rate. This would likely cause much more harm than good but every once in a while I get the urge.

The list would be placed someplace where any of my friends could see it.

Now I must preface what I am about to say with two statements.

1) I am not a great friend. I can forget birthdays, go for too long without calling to catch up or make plans. I will often give advice even when I am not asked for my input and then become annoyed when a friend doesn't do exactly what I told them to do.

2) This may not apply to you so don't panic and hire somebody to have me killed. That could be a senseless waste of your finances.

I would like to register the following Komplaints.

1) Friend A, B, C & D have not returned my emails in a very, very long time.

2) Friend E and I were supposed to be working on a project and really digging in but Friend E ran off with his girlfriend/lover. This is the second time this has happened.

3) Friend F has been emailling me every few months to tell me that he's sorry that he hasn't gotten to the animation he really wants to get to but hasn't had time.

5) Friend H and I (me) had a bit of a falling out a few months back but friend H and I (me) are doing well. I don't really have any complaints about friend H. Oh, he did promise to get me the Sanford and Son ring tone and has yet to deliver. So good that H & I (me) cleared the air.

6) Friend J has not returned my call and last I heard she was going through some serious depression and I did what I could to help her and be there and then she just dropped of the radar screen.

7) Friend K is a dear friend who i have not spoken to since she told me she was planning on moving back to Los Angeles. I didn't call her back for a long time and left a message apologizing for my behavior and I have not heard from her.

8) Friend L is incredibly self-conscious and doesn't seem to realize that she and I are in very different phases of our lives and that I don't really relate to all the things she says and her insecurity and... she gets annoyed with me because I don't make plans. But she talks too much about nothing and is a horrible listener who doesn't stop going on at length about things she has already told me. So that is one I am okay letting go of.

9) Friend M contacted me to let me know she would be in LA and then never responded when I tried to make plans with her. But she sent me a killer mix CD with a sweet handmade CD case. To me getting something in the mail shows extra effort points.

10) Friend O is very busy and hasn't gotten around to letting me know the specifics of her California visit plans. Actually this applies to two of my friends who I love dearly but haven't heard a peep from in quite some time.

There are many more formal complaints I could lodge with the Friendship Bureau, but the only thing that writing this down does is make me sad and frustrated and isolated. I feel stuck, because in most of these cases there is nothing I can really do to correct the situation. I feel like I have been making so much more of an effort than these friends of mine have. None of these instances of "flakiness" or "laziness" or disinterest would be all that bad as isolated events, but the fact that they are all happening at once is quite upsetting and the cumulative affect, plus some job-hunt stress made me start crying the other day. I just feel unsupported by so many people in my life right now and I wonder how many of these friendships that I value are going to get washed away for good. I wonder what more I can do to revive these relationships and nurture them. How do you pick and choose who you give your time to? I can't recall feeling this ignored and un-appreciated. I'm sorry if I contributed to the communication gap but in most of the situations I don't think that is the case. I know that nobody can be aware that there are currently several dozen other people who are letting me down and/or not taking time to respond to my efforts to connect with them. It makes me wonder why this is happening all at once. I think about the nature of friendship and I wonder if everybody has a friend because they give them something that they need, physical, emotional, material, whatever... Why do people become friends? Is it that they have a similar outlook on life? Common Interests? Shared experiences? Complementary senses of humor? I think of all the people who have been my close friends over the years and how those friendships just naturally faded away. I wonder if it's better not to care about other people so much that you get invested in them. It also makes me appreciate being married to an amazing woman. The beauty of marriage is that you agree to share your life together and grow together to stay friends and be there for the other person no matter what flavor of hot coffee life spills on your lap. Today I get what it is to be married. It is essentially best-friend insurance.

Normally it's cathartic to write down my feelings and express my thoughts in writing, but right now it's after 2AM I'm sitting at my computer and I feel weary and weak for even having these thoughts.

You can't use comments as an actual post, can you?

It is a cliche, but it's true. A good man is hard to find and yes, a hard man is good to find... in a bus station bathroom on a cold and lonely October evening. But I digress, that is a blog post for another time. The scars on my broken heart have not healed yet.

Bevis' "love" is like a boomerang. It's potentially dangerous in the wrong hands, it's from Australia, and if you treat it right it keeps coming back to you. It is also highly contagious, causes painful itching and can be used to hunt wombats.

Thanks, Bevis. You honor me with your honorable words. I have decided I want you to have my first born son as an appreciation of gratitude for your... gratious appreciation. I think he currently works at a truck stop someplace down in Tijuana. At least that's what his whore mother told me in her last demand for alimony. Thanks, that would really help me out. Just don't tell him where I am as he was very angry when I dropped him off at the border. As I sped off, he stood at the side of the road shaking his pudgy, little, half-breed bastard fist and loudly swore to have revenge upon his "Gringo Papa-Kranki!" They grow up so fast.

AOME (Apple of my eye) , you won the Grammar-contest email me at krankiboy@yahoo.com to instruct me where to send your prize.

Story Around

I will attempt to use all of your favorite words in one grammatically correct sentence.


Disgruntled that the architect's shoddy, sluice design had flooded the castle with water, the king abruptly tossed him into the oubliette with nothing but a single crumpet for nourishment, and a taciturn cockchafer for company.

I think this has the makings for a superbly brilliant story. Would somebody please compose the second sentence in this story. Then another person do the next and so on. I would really like to see what the end result of is.

I am quite serious. Please read the comments and contribute the next sentence that progresses the story.

Runny Nose Friday

I have had the sniffles for a few days now, which is annoying enough, but now I am starting to feel crappy head cold symptoms. I'm thinking some PCP might knock the cold right out of my head. I have never heard of anybody on Angel Dust complaining about having a head cold. From what I have seen in the movies and TV they generally are very preoccupied with thinking that they can fly and jumping off tall buildings or getting into high speed car chases with police that end with savage beatings.

I thought I had more to share.... hmmm.

Oh yeah. School is strange. A few years ago there were some people who began calling dice "number cubes" so that it didn't encourage gambling. This is of course retarded. You don't want kids to know that dice are also used for gambling? Shhhhussh! They are also used to play fucking Yahtzee! You assholes! However, when I was in school, it was frowned on to have playing cards in school. Some kids had them but they were not allowed. This seemed reasonable to me. Now with the growing trend in poker on TV and Texas Hold Em in particular, the powers that be have taken to using cards in math classes. That's cool, it's a fun way to learn how to add or multiply with flash cards while also having fun. Today I filled in for a teacher and was asked to teach the kids how to play Poker in preparation for the pretend gambling that they will have at the up coming Gold Rush-themed Graduation Event. That's a pretty big fucking flip flop on the kids and gambling issue. When all those future gamblers start flooding into Vegas and Atlantic City I just hope there are enough hookers to go around.

Oh, and why are all the hookers in Hollywood transvestites? Can somebody please explain to me how a very mannish person dressing up as a woman of ill repute is in any way sexy to anybody.

My train of thought has run off the tracks today. I started with a runny nose and got all the way to tranny hookers. It will be nice to have this blog so that they can follow the posts to see my brain slowly devolve to a state of absentia.

Crack Research

I did not think it was possible but my crack* Research Department has uncovered an even better word than cumshaw.

One entry found for cockchafer.

Main Entry: cock·cha·fer
Pronunciation: 'käk-"chA-f&r
Function: noun
Etymology: 1cock + chafer: a large European beetle (Melolontha melolontha) destructive to vegetation as an adult and to roots as a larva; also : any of various related beetles

I naturally assumed it referred to a rough, rugged, and unkempt vagina.



* Just to clarify... The term "crack" is used as a adjective to mean efficient and not the rock form of cocaine. That is an entirely separate department.

Thank You for the Cumshaw!

My new favorite word is cumshaw. Fustigate has been moved down the list to #3 right behind girth.

I have a special fondness for words that sound extremely dirty but aren't. I sub-taught today at a school I haven't subbed before. Let's call it Falsewood Avenue School. I did work at Falsewood Avenue about two years ago in an enrichment program so I knew several of the kids. There was one particular kid who I will call Buddy. Buddy was that annoying, insecure fat kid who always wanted to get his way. He would moan in at a decibel level that started out like a fog horn but quickly rose to a pitch that not even dogs could hear. He always had a thin layer of dirt on his face and had chocolate or some other delightful looking food crusted on the corner of his lips. Buddy, was the only kid that I truly, truly disliked and the only kid to ever show up to ruin otherwise cheerful dreams like the bully who knocks over your nearly perfect sand castle before your friends get to see it. The next day at school I actually told Buddy that he was not allowed to visit my subconscious. He had no clue what I was talking about but he never appeared in my dreams again. At lest my subconscious understood the rules. I pulled Buddy aside one day and gave him a lecture. It was a pretty good lecture and it actually hit home with him. I told him how he would regret being disrespectful to people because he might need something from them someday and they will remember how rude and disrespectful he was towards them.

So today, when I rounded the corner to pick up the Falsewood 4th grade class, it was truly magical to see the look on Buddy's face when he realized that it was me, his most hated teacher who would be running the show as his teacher for the day. The phrase "his jaw dropped" was coined for just such an occasion. He was extremely well behaved, and because the other kids saw that the annoying Buddy was a bit scared of the teacher and acting like a angel, I had their full and undivided attention without having to utter a word.

I also had a kid who would speak to his imaginary friend Todd. It was so strange because the other kids treated this kid's imaginary friend like he was truly the class mascot. They would ask questions about Todd and if Todd liked watching Shrek 2 and which was Todd's favorite part of the movie.

Getting back to my original thought which was several hundred words ago. I wanted to relate that while reading a short story out loud to the class I stumbled over a word, which I rarely do when reading aloud. Clearly the drugs are catching up with my mind. "Run, brain cells, run!!!"

It wouldn't have been a big deal except that instead of reading the sentence as it was written - "What do you mean, when you say can't?!" I missread the dialogue and, in a loud and clear voice I said to to the 9 and 10 year old girls and boys... "What do you mean when you come say cunt?!" Only a few of the kids recognized my slip up. I quickly scrambled to cover my mistake and read the next few lines of dialogue with as much excitement as possible so as to try roll right past my enormous Tourette's-syndrome-Freudian slip-and-fall. It's a tad bit better than when, during a bugs class for kindergarten kids, I casually said to the teacher who I was assisting that "That scorpions tail looks fucked up!" The teacher looked up at me with shock and said "What did you just say?!" Not realizing what I'd just said I repeated myself a second time. Louder and slower.

Please, as a cumshaw to the Khronicle readers, share a favorite word or two of yours. Because sharing is caring and caring... just tell us some of your favorite fucking words you scabie-ridden cockholsters!

www.m-w.com

TTTSC*


*to tired to spell check